Its been awhile

Well a lot has been going on. i havent been on here in some time so i figured well since im home bound why not.
i just got home a week ago from the hospital. i was at mission for a week and then i was at a rehab faculity for 10 days. i can not feel any part of my body and what i do feel is shooting nerve pain that just seems to want to get worse instead of better. doctors are saying that i might never feel my body again. they dont know whats wrong. all they know is there is nothing organic in my system and that there is nothing else they can do. so i am going on positive thoughts and prayers. which seems to help some days and not so much others. but i am tough so i get by. i am hoping for the best but expecting the worse just in case.
i have my own apartment now. going on 1 year. im very excited about it. love the fact that i can actually call it home. its not very big but its big enough for me. i love it so much. still trying to make it more of a home with pictures and everything but its slowly getting there. so it makes me happy that i am able to do this. atleast until i can find a house that i can really make a home. something i can fix up that i can actually call mine. but my apartment will have to do for now and it does wonders.
which makes me come to the next thing. i have found a wonderful man and after 3 years of fighting patrick and everything that has happened with that. i have found someone that treats me so good and loves me and knows me inside and out. we went to high school together but we just connected as soon as we started talking. we both have had a bad past but it only makes us stronger. we dont fight and when we do its not for long and not very often. we have a lot in common and i love him dearly. he supports me and has been there with everything that has been going on the last few weeks. he met dad and marcia while i was in charlotte and dad said that he is a keeper. made me smile so big. my dad has never said that about any one. he is perfect and so very amazing. God knew that i needed him now and i have changed so much with everything that im so glad that he did. he sent me a wonderful man that i see as my soulmate. we have a lot in common seems like we have everything in common actually say just a few things that we dont. but im very happy and he keeps my spirits high in this time of doubting. i am so lucky i have him here. that i finally found him. that i can stop looking for my person because he is my person. he has never left my side even in the hospital. he stayed all day and when i was in charlotte he came and saw me every weekend. he even came with his mom one wednesday after he had a doctors appointment. his mom is lovely. she is amazing just like her son.
so that is the most up to date i have. but it is heavenly. :) love you all thanks for all the support and prayers. i know they help and it keeps me positive.